I found this on Lea's blog and it describes my life perfectly. The shoes that I have been forced to wear are so unbearably uncomfortable....but I cannot take them off. I think that sometimes people don't realize that we have to wear these shoes everyday....
I am somewhere in between aching daily as I try to walk in them....those days don't come as often. I am learning to walk in them, but I am no where near the place where I have worn them so long that days go by before I think about how much they hurt.
Though I wish I could change things and give us all our little one's back I feel lucky to know I am no the only one who wears these shoes. By talking with and having the support of these women it makes it much easier to walk in these shoes on a daily basis....b/c until you have walked in them - you really truly have no idea.
I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes, uncomfortable shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes, they are looks of sympathy.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world.
Some women are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.