Sunday, September 26, 2010

2 years without you

My dear sweet little boy,

I still can't believe that 2 years have come and gone. I miss you today, like I miss you everyday. But instead of being sad that you are gone I want to thank you for all you have taught, shown and given me over the last 2 years. There were times when I didn't think I could go on without you here, but somewhere deep inside I found the strength to put one foot in front of the other...and I really do believe that you had a lot to do with that.

Having you in my life, even if it was for such a short time changed me, it made really realize who and what are important - because of you I am trying not to sweat the small stuff anymore. Because of you I have met some amazing people, many of who have also lost their little ones, and it brings me comfort to think that you are all up there playing together, every once in a while looking down at us and smiling.

I know you know that we are having another baby - but I also know that you know that this baby will never, ever replace you. I am sad that, like us, this baby will never know his or her big brother in person, but I promise you that they will know all about you and all that you taught us since. By us knowing and having you, I hope that this baby will be kinder, more loving and more gentle because of you.

With tears running down my face I know I don't need to be sad because you are in a good place, but know that I love you, miss you and think about you each and every single day.

Love you forever and always,


  1. Beautiful, Mama.... missing sweet Jackson with you. Lighting Nicholas' candle night in his honour.


  2. Sending you and your angel Hugs and Love .